6 Steps to Low-Stress Wedding Planning

Every piece of wedding planning advice I've seen online had been unrealistic, unhelpful or the same AI slop about your opinion being the only one that matters because it's your day. You live in the real world with real family and friends. Here's the guide and reality check I wish I had when I first started wedding planning:

1. Make a list of everyone you definitely want at the wedding

Make a bare bones list of the people you can't imagine your wedding without. This could be literally just the 2 of you or it could be the entire population of the every town you've every lived in. It's what makes the two of you happy.

2. Make a list of people who already have (or are likely to express) strong opinions about your wedding

Wedding planning seems to invite a lot of opinions, assumptions and expectations. Make a 'People with Opinions' list. Include everyone that's already shared an opinion with you and everyone that is likely to (this will probably include everyone in your family - sometimes even the family members you least expected).

3. Cross off everyone from your 'People with Opinions' list whose opinions truely don't matter to you

Most people have planned an event before, what makes wedding planning far more stressful is fielding opinions, setting boundaries and negotiating plans to make everyone happy. It really helps to be honest about whose opinion really matters to you and seek out their thoughts before you're knee deep in planning. It's your day and your opinion should matter most, but it's unrealistic to think that the opinions of people you care about won't impact your planning process (either altering your planning and choices or draining you emotionally as you constantly say "no" but feel guilty). Remove anyone whose opinions truely don't matter to you from your 'People with Opinions' list. Reorder your list in order of 'most important opinion' to help when there's conflicting opinions.

4. Make an 'Important Things' list

Everything that's important to you in relation to the wedding belongs on the 'Important Things' list. This may include the opinions of your 'People with Opinions', it may include your wedding date or the time within which you want to get married. It may include wedding elements and vendors. Whatever if important to both (or either) of you, belongs on this list.

Order your Important Things list from most to least important

5. Research the cost of your Important Things list

Try to get quotes from 3 vendors that match your requirements for anything that requires payment on your Important Things list.

Update your Important Things list if there are any items you change your mind about as you research costs

6. Discuss your budget

Consider whether you can afford the wedding as you want it at this point in time.

If you can afford the wedding, congratulations you've already done the 20% that makes 80% of the difference to stress-free wedding planning!

The next step is speaking to the people who made it onto the 'People with Opinions' list and reiterating over your guest list, Important Things list and nailing down details from there.

If the wedding is not affordable right now

• Consider whether your priorities are set in stone or if they can be altered further to bring the wedding into budget.
• Look for discounts and swap outs (i.e., you can get guest photos using the Keepsake app and find vendor discounts through the app too. Check out the website for more info: www.keepsakeapp.io).
• Consider how long it will take you to save up the minimum likely amount required for you to happily get married and discuss whether waiting until you have the finances would be a better option for you both or if you would prefer to reiterate on the Important Things list.